took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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