Is it normal to miss your booty call?
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
