im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize