Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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