why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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