She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
she peed on how many people?
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
