currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
what the fuck happened to the tacos
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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