They should really pass out barf bags in church
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
