Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I could fuck to npr.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Randomize
