Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize