wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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