walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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