I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
