I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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