What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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