He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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