I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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