i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
