Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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