I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
doctor said mango vodka does not count as my daily servings of fruit. damn.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
