i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Terrible idea I love it
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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