do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
