Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
