dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize