I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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