Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Randomize
