I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
