just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
