You were right. It hurts to walk today.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
