nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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