Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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