Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize