I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
