Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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