the new term for farting is butt boxing.
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
