So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize