I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Everything about him screamed your future.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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