all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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