Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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