Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
how drunk are you?
Several
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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