Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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