I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
