batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
