how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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