Having a random hookup so left but love u
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
