aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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