My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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