i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
