Swine flu. Run for my life!
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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