So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Do you remember whose house we're in?
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