you guys were way drunker than both of me
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
